I live within a very diverse family unit. My faith is still in things cast aside by many of them. Do I tolerate them? Or, do they tolerate me?

Homosexuality has cost me a very personal price. The largest price has quite possibly been that I cannot have peace in my family while having peace with God. Why? That is because homosexuality has been the very reason that my home has not been allowed to be a faith based home. You cannot pick and choose through scriptures to make them fit what you want them to say. I have tried and it doesn’t work. The division in this family runs so deep on this issue of religion that somewhere something has to give and the only way to make it work is the way we have found… in my relinquishing a voice to my own beliefs because majority rules in families too. Showing respect for your father within our homes has been made a higher priority to keep the peace and allow you girls to grow within an environment of respect. I made that choice a lot of years ago and have no regret for it.

I would expect the same kind of tolerance to be shown in graciousness by my daughters to people they do not find agreement with. I have tried very hard to set an example of tolerance for you. The kind of tolerance that allows for individual choices to be made. The kind of tolerance that gives others the ability to just be who they are and live a peaceful life without violent judgement. The kind of tolerance that gives you a chance to campaign for your beliefs but accepts others choices too.

Just as they think homosexuality is a great “sin”…. You find them “stupid” which for you is the greatest sin.

Tolerance ends wars both large and small.

Tolerance goes both ways.

I want to attempt to address your response to Kim with a few thoughts.

“And although one may not agree with the behaviors of certain people (like the LDS church, etc.) where is the grounds of denying them equality and rights?”

There are many places in our legal system where people are denied rights: sometimes as a consequence for breaking the law (convicted felons have their right to vote stripped), sometimes because of age (17 year olds do not have the right to vote in our country, 15 year olds do not have the right to drive a car), and sometimes because a person’s concept of morality does not match the laws of our country (a person cannot marry multiple people at the same time, and an adult cannot marry a minor without parental consent). There is a long standing tradition in our country of limiting rights, which is the basis for any kind of government apart from anarchy. Every time I get a paycheck, I’m bummed that the government does not treat me as an equal to someone that makes less money. The thing that sets us apart from many other countries is the amount of freedom and equality we have, but it is definitely not absolute.

“If America is not a religious theocracy, your decisions based on religion should not govern your vote.”

I wholly agree that the US is not a religious theocracy, however it is impossible to separate one’s religion from one’s basis for morality. Everyone has a standard of morality, whether it’s their religion, their family or other aspects of their culture. These things all factor into what each person thinks is “right” or moral. You, I, and everyone else have these standards, and they directly play into how we vote. My religion governs my morality, and like everyone else, my morality governs my vote. So if this is wrong, why is it wrong?

“What I need to hear are legitimate reasons to vote ‘Yes of 8′ that are not based off of religion. I have yet to hear one.”

I believe homosexuality is morally wrong. I’m guessing from your post that you believe homosexuality is morally acceptable. Leaving religion completely out of this equation, my moral belief was the reason I voted ‘Yes on 8′. Is that legitimate? You might not agree with my basis for morality, but that alone doesn’t make my reason illegitimate, right? Some ballot measures can be argued on logic (1A, 7, 10) but others require a moral position (4, 5, 8). I think you’re asking for a logical reason or answer to a moral question, but when you have a different standard for truth and morality, it’s impossible to answer the question with logic. Does that make any sense at all?

Here’s a brief response with a secular perspective (which I want to mention that both sides have a moral (i.e. religious) basis, just a different moral).

1. A few judges overturned what the majority in CA voted for in 2000. Legislating from the bench is not constitutional.

2. To change the definition of meaningful word to please a minority with no clear, objective standard upon which to make that change is not really the government’s role. The basis of all societies is the family structure. Can the US gov’t decide to alter that basic structure based on no particular standard, or without consulting religion? Maybe. But if that is so, perhaps the government should not have any role at ALL in saying what marriage is, and should stop issuing marriage licenses to everyone, keeping it in the private sector.

3. Making homosexual marriage a civil rights issue will lead to infringing on the freedom of religion — churches, pastors and religious people who call it “wrong” and/or refuse to marry homosexual couples can be sued/prosecuted for discrimination and hate crime and speech. Religious freedom is guaranteed in the First Amendment.

I know you wish to separate our laws from religion, but that is not actually possible. Many of our most fundamental laws and freedoms have a basis in religion or religious values (murder being wrong, for example).

With all that said, I don’t think you will have to wait long for this amendment to be overturned.

I understand that many accept scripture as holy and abide by that law because they have chosen to do so.

My reasoning roots in the fact that I find no legitimate reason as to why one should follow scripture and everything it says, hence the Adam and Eve point. I cannot simply accept it and not question it without reason.

And although one may not agree with the behaviors of certain people (like the LDS church, etc.) where is the grounds of denying them equality and rights?

If America is not a religious theocracy, your decisions based on religion should not govern your vote. What I need to hear are legitimate reasons to vote ‘Yes of 8′ that are not based off of religion. I have yet to hear one.

A minor correction: the LDS church did not deny membership to blacks. It denied them the priesthood and temple blessings, which essentially is the only path to salvation and eternal life. They still allowed them to be members of the church. Maybe because any church member is allowed to pay tithing?

Things will all turn out okay, eventually. Some day.

I am responding to your request to hear from “Yes on 8″ supporters, because I believe you sincerely want to understand our view. I dont expect to convince you of my opinion, not at all, but I do hope that you will be able to see another side, and understand that my view is not out of hate.

Ill tell you that it is ironic to me, that those of us that have supported Prop 8 have been called all kinds of names, including one gal mentioned wanting to pull out a fake machine gun to shoot those holding “Yes on 8″ signs. This “hate” coming from the very people demanding “tolerance.”

It is particularly hurtful, because I believe that my view has been twisted (and many other 8 supporters.) So, while I dont want to change your mind, I do hope you will come away from my response recognizing that I dont hate gay people.

I am not a Mormon, I am a Christian. Raised Catholic, but I attend a non-denominational church. I view God’s Word as sacred, EVEN THE PARTS THAT CONDEMN MY OWN BEHAVIOR. I recognize that we are in a fallen world, and every single person is flawed.

It makes no difference to me, if someone is born gay, as we are all born into sin, according to the Bible.

I believe we all engage in behaviors that may be enjoyable, or seem natural, and yet, they are not the way God intends for us to behave. The Bible says:

Proverbs 14:12″There is a way that seems right to a man, but its end is the way of death.” This is repeated later, in Prov. 16:25 – “THERE IS A WAY THAT SEEMS RIGHT TO A MAN, BUT ITS END IS THE WAY OF DEATH.”

I dont think that is speaking directly to homosexuality, I think it is speaking to all mankind re: a multitude of behaviors.

With that said, while I do think homosexuality is sin, and contrary to God’s design (I realize there are gay couples with children, but Ive yet to meet one that conceived naturally.)

The Bible speaks to this beyond the Old Testament, the following is in the New Testament, and there are other references as well:

Romans 1:26-27: “For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature: And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman, burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence [ of their error which was meet.”

Because I accept this scripture as Holy, I will believe it and teach my children this as truth.

There are many things I will teach my children, and as humans, they will not be able to obey all that I teach (nor can I myself)…that doesnt mean I hate them, or hate myself, it means I am thankful that Christ died for my sins, and has given me hope of eternal life, in a paradise WITHOUT SIN. But we will all fall short on this earth, and nobody deserves to be hated, in fact, God loves us all, equally, the gay and the straight.

Loving someone, does not mean condoning their behavior.

As you bring up the Mormon church, to which I do not belong….let’s dig up more of their past and bring up polygamy. If a man and 3 women want to marry, and love each other, who am I to stand in their way?

I believe as a society, we are able to set parameters and boundaries re: things such as marriage. I think we need to have norms re: marriage, and think that marriage should be limited to a man and woman, one of each.

Would I hate a polygamist, merely because he views marriage differently? NO. But that doesnt mean I would accept his view.

I realize many will not accept my opinion, but I hope they at least see that it is rooted in my belief in God’s scriptures, and not out of hate for any person.

The saddest thing about all of this, is that many “No on 8″ people have said hateful and mean things, because people didnt agree with them. They have assumed that not believing in gay marriage is caused by despising people and not caring about them, and that is not the case.

I hope you come away from my post, recognizing that I love people regardless of their sexual choices. My beliefs include God’s love for every person. I hope when you come across people that dont support gay marriage, you wont feel as if they are against you or your family, or that they dont like you or your family….they just dont agree with some behaviors….and likewise, I know you wont agree with the behaviors of everyone else either – but it’s not a reason for people to hate each other or be hurtful.

My view of tolerance, is to accept that people have varying beliefs, and be able to care about them regardless of the differences…..I hope that such tolerance can be given by both sides.